Do you remember your first thoughts when you heard things were going into lockdown?
I was on set with my daughter, Zoe, who’s filming Season 2 of the Netflix Series, Black Summer. The director gathered around all the cast and crew (and me, since I don’t fit into either of those categories) and said that we would be going on a 2 week break. From there we would see what was going to happen.
I remember feeling disappointed because Zoe was having so much fun living her dream, but I also thought it was going to be an amazing opportunity for people to do some introspection and deep self-care. My mind literally thought, “This is wonderful! People will now be able to meditate and journal and do all sorts of other things that will really change their lives!”
Less than a minute later, I heard someone say, “This is awesome! I’m going to get a Playstation on the way home and play for 2 weeks straight!”
“Ok,” I thought, “I guess not...
The other day, I was laying in bed thinking about all of the wild and weird things I’ve done in the name of personal development. Perhaps you’d like to sneak a peek at a few of them? Just make sure you take off your Supreme Court Justice cap (because you may be tempted to judge some of them!)
These adventures happened at various courses I attended all over North America; on beaches in Mexico, lavender fields in California, mountains in British Columbia, hotel ballrooms all over the place, at the foot of a Rocky Mountain glacier, oh... and even in a yurt in an old growth rainforest.
Ok, are you ready? Here’s an abbreviated list of ways I’ve abandoned my comfort zone.
-walked on fire
-hiked up a mountain with bricks in my backpack
-stood on my chair in a room of 400+ people, yelling, “Pick Me!” when everyone else just politely raised their hands
-skinny dipped in the ocean in the dark (terrifying)
If you tuned in last time, you’ll know that the topic of discussion was dealing with the unknown. If you didn’t read last week’s message, then I guess it’s still unknown to you (hee hee). Click here to read it now. Then you won't have FOMO.
Did you happen to ponder how you deal with the unknown? Another way of asking that question is to consider how much time you spend worrying. Ruminating and stressing out are the most popular ways of dealing with the unknown, if you haven’t yet trained your mind.
I love the saying that worrying is like rocking very exuberantly* in a rocking chair with the expectation of getting somewhere. It’s a whole lot of effort with no results. (*the exuberant part is my own wording… most sayings don’t use that fancy word, but I like the mental picture it creates… exuberant rocking.)
Ok, I just checked the original quote, and it looks like my own saying is way off, even without the juicy adverb....
How do you feel about the unknown?
As we discussed last week (or rather, I discussed and you read), times are weird.
Have you noticed that you feel a little lost? Or perhaps you’ve observed that you’re feeling a distinct decrease in your sense of control.
With all the energetic shifts lately, as a human collective, we’re being called to rise to some new challenges.
One of the main invitations for us right now is to get more comfortable with the unknown.
Many people live in a state of low-grade worry and fear, when it comes to the future. We’re often taught that bad things could happen in the upcoming weeks/months/years, and so the most logical response is to be distrustful and vigilant. The world is out to get us, so it’s a good idea to plan for the worst and control as much as we can.
Wow. When it’s down in writing like that, it seems pretty intense, doesn’t it?
If that’s your current way of being, do you really want to...
I do this amazing practice called Sitting for Guidance that I learned from my mentors, Marci Shimoff & Debra Poneman. Most days, I get out my journal with the intention of communicating with my higher self to see what comes through.
Many days, it’s kind of a list of things to do. Other days, the practice reveals ideas that I never could have made up. And then other times, it’s full of encouragement and deep wisdom.
Here’s the message I’ve been getting lately: write, write, write, Write, WRITE!
It seems like Spirit is trying to tell me something…
And so here we are; me writing, you reading - a match made in heaven. I realize I’ve been out of touch with you. And sometimes things like that are ok. Until they’re not. Which brings us to this point.
Here’s what I would like to share with you.
Although the Great Pause (pandemic) has been stressful for many people, I’ve truly never been happier. Perhaps if I share a few...
One day, when I was in high school, I made an important discovery. I was on my bed, crying dramatically about something (perhaps I just got dumped, or cut from a sports team, or my souffle had fallen). There was sobbing, flailing, tears streaming, when all of a sudden, I noticed that there was something positively delicious about being sad.
Have you ever noticed that allowing yourself to fully experience sadness feels really, really good?
If not, maybe you’ve been too scared to feel sad and you haven’t received the pleasure that’s hidden in sadness.
Here’s the thing about uncomfortable emotions like sadness. We spend a lot of energy avoiding them or suppressing them and so we’re never really able to receive the full benefits.
All emotions are valuable and have a purpose. If they didn’t, they wouldn’t exist.
Sadness is worth embracing for the following reasons:
1. A function of sadness is connection (as was brilliantly illustrated in...
Once, on a trip to Hawaii, my daughter Zoe, who was about 4 years old at the time, was jumping on the hotel bed. I told her to stop. She did, but she looked me in the eye and declared, “Mommy, you filled my heart with rage!”
I’ve been contemplating rage, as it seems to be a prevalent emotion these days. What are we supposed to do with rage as it surfaces in such giant waves? And why is it so tumultuous right now? And what’s the best action to take in the storm?
Let’s dive in.
1. What to do with all the rage?
There are ultimately 2 choices. Fight rage with rage by being against what’s happening OR be for what you actually want.
When you choose to fight against something, you create energetic tension, which then creates more energy towards what you don’t want.
When you choose to be for something, you create an opening for a new possibility. By embracing the uncomfortable, you can transmute it into love.
Mother Theresa said that...
As you may or may not know, I'm really fascinated by our relationship with Time (it gets a capital T here because it's kind of a big deal). Befriending Time is even one of the 12 Foundational Skill Sets of Courageous Self-Care.
How we interact with Time affects every second of our day, not to mention our life. It's an idea worth thinking about. It's also worth taking action to improve that relationship.
I've had some thoughts and observations recently that I wanted to share with you.
When my daughter, Zoe, was little, I had visions of us baking together because that's something I loved doing with my mom. Zoe, however, had zero interest in whipping up magical creations in the kitchen with me. I was disappointed for a while but then accepted it and carried on having my own baked goods fun.
Fast forward about 12 years, and to my surprise, Zoe LOVES being in the kitchen. In fact, she spent all of yesterday evening making healthy donuts, cookies and scones for her...
Last week, I shared some of my secrets with you (about book writing and one woman shows and such) and then I inserted a tremendous cliffhanger, saying that I still had secrets!
I know you've been waiting allllllll week to find out the other parts of my life, that until now, I've kept locked away, like Rebel Wilson in her stylish but creepy dungeon in The Hustle. (Not sure what I'm talking about? It's a new movie released on Mother's Day co-starring Anne Hathaway which made me laugh out loud multiple times. Kind of like Dirty Rotten Scoundrels mixed with girl power.)
Now. The Secrets.
Usually I work on something quietly and privately and then when it's finished and successful and ready to go, I tell people about it. It's a very safe way to do things because if I don't actually finish or something goes awry, you'll never know and I still look gooood.
Today is a day to do things differently. And courageously. I'm going to share with you something that is a big...
Did I tell you that I'm writing a book?
Well, actually 5 books.
I thought I was going to write one, and it's been percolating for a few years now, but as it turns out, it's going to be 5.
Here's what happened:
I was super gung-ho with my plans for the new year. I had visions and flow charts and pages of notes on how I was going to move forward with my online program, and coaching and so on.
I started working the plan.
My intuition (and my astute energy healer) informed me that my plan was not going to go as planned. You know the saying, "You make plans and God laughs"? Gales of cosmic laughter coming my way.
I joined in the laughter and released the plan. Very soon afterwards, a new idea came my way. A big idea. A very scary idea.
At first I kept it a secret because it seemed so audacious, but I've become friends with the idea and am feeling effusive about putting it out into the world. Want to know what it is? I'm assuming you're giving...