Why I used to be scared of you

Jun 22, 2021

I used to be scared of you. Well, not you specifically, but I was scared of the vague collection of all the you’s who read my blog and emails. 

I also used to be scared of people who visited my website and the people I met who asked me, “So, what do you do?”

Why would I be so scared of you?

I was fearful of being judged, rejected and misunderstood.

Here’s what I did for years. I would create an amazing program or coaching package. I would do all the hours and hours of behind the scenes work, crafting the language, making the visuals, putting all the pieces in place. And then I wouldn’t tell a soul.

That got frustrating for my big heart that just wanted to share and teach, so I upped my game. I thought if I really went all out and invested in something big, I would have to tell people because I would be motivated to make a return on my investment. I put a down payment on a retreat that I decided I was going to run in Costa Rica. I planned out...

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Top 5 Reasons to Check out this Month’s Self-Care Masterclass

Jun 15, 2021

Well, hello there! Thanks for stopping by. I don’t know if you know about the monthly Self-Care Masterclasses and their origins, so I decided today is the day. It’s compiled into a catchy top 5 list, because who doesn’t love a countdown?

The Brief Preamble

Towards the end of 2020, I had the inspiration to do monthly Self-Care Masterclasses. Although it was an uncomfortable stretch, I decided that 2021 would include these masterclasses. Why?

I’ve spent so many years learning from masters around the world and I absolutely love taking what I’ve learned, putting my own twist on it and then sharing it. Plus, being a former teacher, it feels great to use that gift. 

Each month, I tune into what will best serve our community and then I design a masterclass around it. One of my gifts is taking big spiritual ideas and turning them into practical, strategic action steps you can easily incorporate into your life. 

So far, the people who have...

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This is what I do when I feel like doing nothing

Jun 08, 2021

A couple of Sundays ago, {{first_name}}, my family and I were making our plans for the day. We usually do our cleaning on Sundays and we were talking about some other things to do as well. My husband, Paul, said, “So what do you want to do today?” 

Many ideas flashed through my mind, but what came out of my mouth was, “I don’t want to do anything. I want to do nothing.” That was followed by a surprise visit of a cascade of tears that I didn’t even know were in there. 

Being the amazing guy he is, Paul said, “Well, why don’t you just do nothing? What does that mean?”

With trepidation, I shared what I would have rather kept secret because it felt embarrassing. In the spirit of authenticity, though, I said, “I just want to watch movies all day long.” I had never done that and it felt so… irresponsible. It also had a glimmer of deliciousness, though. Could I really give myself permission to lie in bed and...

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How to not try so hard and still get results

Jun 01, 2021

Have you ever thought, “Well, I guess I just need to work harder to get what I want?”

Probably. The generation before us was all about hard work. And it served them pretty well (apart from the self-care bit).

So, what if you’re exhausted, on the verge of burnout? Do you really think working harder is the solution?

It’s not. It’s not even about working smarter. It’s about getting the same or even better results with more ease and flow. Doesn’t that sound better?

Wouldn’t you love to get better results by doing less?

Here’s a little story to illustrate my point.

 

In March I did some work for an organization and sent them an invoice, as requested. They said they would submit the invoice for payment immediately.

A week went by and… no payment. Another week, same thing. I started feeling annoyed. And then it escalated to angry, so I increased my efforts to collect the money. I sent some inquiry emails and was assured...

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What are you waiting for?

May 25, 2021

Do you know one of the most significant challenges I hear from my clients?

Prolonging their happiness.

Of course, they don’t say it like that. Most often, they don’t even realize they’re doing it.

Instead, they say things like:

  • I’m soooo busy!
  • It never feels like I’ve done enough
  • It feels like there’s something missing
  • I don’t know how to slow down
  • My to-do list just keeps getting longer!

What’s going on is that they’re waiting for “someday” to allow themselves to feel happier. 

When I have more money saved, then I’ll be happier.

When I fit into my clothes, then I’ll be happier.

When I’m eating the way I should, then I’ll be happier.

When I have more free time, then I’ll be happier.

When my relationships with my kids/spouse are better, then I’ll be happier.

When I’m healthier, then I’ll be happier.

Do you see the insidious problem there?

Things are never going to...

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Do you believe this about comfort zones?

May 18, 2021

I was coaching a client last week and she brought up something really important about comfort zones. After her session, it came up with several other clients too, and it seems like it’s a thing. When something is a thing, I think it’s important to look under the rock and see what’s going on.

First, the misperception. Have you ever heard the expression: Life begins at the end of your comfort zone? 

Here’s the actual quote I just discovered: “You never change your life until you step out of your comfort zone; change begins at the end of your comfort zone.”Roy T. Bennett

Now we know that it was Roy who said it first. Thanks Roy!

Here’s another one: “The further you get away from yourself, the more challenging it is. Not to be in your comfort zone is great fun.”Benedict Cumberbatch

In my quick little bit o’ research for comfort zone quotes, there was definitely a vibe, essentially stating that if you want to be...

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The missing key to a fulfilling life

May 11, 2021

I talk to so many clients who are incredibly productive. They set and achieve amazing goals. They’re on the go from morning to night doing both work-type activities and self-care type things like yoga, meditation, eating well and so on. On paper, you would think they have it all. From the outside, their lives look perfect.

And yet, they tell me that there’s something missing. They’re on a mission and they’re living their purpose, but as soon as they accomplish something (like writing a book, getting a million hits on their podcast, landing a new dream client, exponentially increasing their income, selling a home, completing a certification or expanding their team), they say, “Ok! What’s next?”

Can you tell what’s missing? I won’t keep you hangin’... it’s self-acknowledgement and celebration. These two practices are absolutely critical if you want to feel fulfilled, valued and appreciated.

Here’s the thing,...

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Great Expectations?

May 04, 2021

So, I was out for a run a few days ago (and trust me, when I say those words - I was out for a run- it’s like a miracle, no matter how many times I say it, because I really heavily and intensely avoided anything to do with running for a good 3 decades). 

Anyways, I was out for a run and there was a small portion of it that had a really big impact on me. I thought it would probably be helpful for you too. Here’s what happened.

There’s this beautiful route that I run on next to the Elbow River in Calgary. We’re talking scenic rapids, sunlight glinting on water, Canada Geese and Mallard ducks bobbing through the waves. There was even a beaver last week! Gorgeous. (Not the beaver… it looked suspiciously like an R.O.U.S. from the Princess Bride and it felt highly likely that it could attack at any moment.) The route is what’s gorgeous.

Along this river trail, there’s a long stretch of pathway that’s broken up by an intersection....

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What to do with a “bad” day

Apr 27, 2021

Earlier this month, I had what an older version of me would have labelled a “bad day”. Let me show you why I wouldn't call it that these days.

First off, I do my best not to use the word “bad” anymore. That way… no bad days!  (Yes, this probably sounds over-simplified, but it’s actually really effective.)

If you think about it, “bad” is just an undescriptive word that carries an energy we don’t want to perpetuate, so it’s worth considering giving it the old heave-ho.

Now, here’s what happened that day.

I opened my email in the morning to find out I had been rejected. Ouch! (That’s what my ego said.) Immediately my mind wanted to make up all sorts of stories, so I noticed that tendency and did some breathwork around the feelings of hurt. I also kept turning my thoughts away from the incident. It took a lot of concerted effort, and I endeavoured to stay persistent with it. (And when I say persistent, I mean...

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This Is How You Get Clarity

Apr 20, 2021

It feels like clarity is up right now. And that’s because when you have clarity, it makes all the difference in your quality of life. At least that's what I've noticed.

When you have clarity, you tend to:

>feel purposeful

>get more out of life

>have higher quality adventures

>experience more flow

>see challenges for what they really are (hint: growth opportunities)

Here’s an example. Aka Story Time!

In January, I got the sense that it was time to move out of our current home. For the last 3 years, we’ve chosen to live in a lovely, luxurious, intimate condo. Our kids share the master bedroom, Paul and I have the other room and then we have our kitchen, living room and dining room. We moved here for quality of life because it’s right by the river, next door to a world class fitness facility and Paul and the kids could all walk/bike to school/work. We’ve loved it… I mean, there’s even a car wash in the heated parkade....

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