The ‘Strong Independent Woman’ idea has been coming up a lot lately in my life, so hopefully this will pertain to you too. (And if you're a man reading this, it totally applies to men as well so just substitute him for her and man for woman as you see fit.)
Once upon a time, when the world was more about survival, people looked up to the strong independent woman as a fortress of consistency. She didn’t crack. She would give of herself completely, no matter what. She didn’t need help. She could get through it all herself. W.O.W. Don’t you want to be just like her?
I hope not, because the strong independent woman is a myth. What I’ve learned, from personal experience and from working with my clients is that the strong independent woman is really just a sad and lonely woman.
Common Experiences of the ‘Strong Independent Woman’
She doesn’t know how to ask for help, or when it’s offered, she...
Happy New Year! I just love a fresh start, don’t you? The new tube of toothpaste always seems so much more appealing than wrestling out the last bits of the old one.
Despite it being -30 Celsius on New Years Eve, we still went out and did our releasing fire. We felt pretty epic, I must say. Two down jackets, leggings, fleece pants, snowpants and double socks did the trick for me.
My phone froze so I couldn’t take photos to share with you, but picture this: a midnight blue sky filled with stars, 2 feet of snow (we had to clear out the fire pit with our mittened hands) and a family of four dancing around the fire as we threw in our scraps of paper where we’d written what we wanted to release and then call in for 2022. The most visually stunning part was that we burnt our wreath made of evergreen branches. At one point, it looked like a golden orb of glittering fire. Pretty spectacular!
Speaking of clearing out old energy, I had an idea that I’m...
Maybe it's much too early in the game
Ah, but I thought I'd ask you just the same
What are you doing New Year's, New Year's Eve?
~Ella Fitzgerald
We just completed our Courageous Self-Care Year End Retrospective yesterday, and it was rich. One of the most important points that came out of it was the idea of how important it is to gather what’s happened and celebrate it, rather than just do and forget.
I used to loathe New Years, mainly because I felt like it was supposed to be special, but the things I chose to do to ‘celebrate’ felt empty.
That all changed when our family created a New Year’s Eve ritual. Now I love New Years because it does, indeed, feel special.
Paul, Zoe, Oakley and I have a few traditions that I would love to share with you. Feel free to take/adapt any part of our celebration that feels good to you.
First, we have a special dinner. Some years we make it ourselves. One memorable year we had breakfast for dinner....
It’s Monday! (Which you probably already knew.) Generally I show up on Tuesdays, but there’s some time sensitive info that I wanted to get to you today. (And just to set the stage, I’m sitting by the fire, while in the background, Bony M is serenading me with their epic Christmas record. An absolute classic.)
Now that you can picture the scene, here’s what I want to share with you this week. I think it’s super important to consciously bring closure to things, such as a whole year of your life. If you just continue to plow forward without ever looking back, you miss out on an opportunity to celebrate who you’ve become. Not only that, without said closure, you may even bring muddy energy forward into the new year. And no one wants muddy energy. Except maybe mud.
Let’s just assume that you love a fresh start, like I do. I’ve got a few things up my sleeve (of which I’m currently wearing 4; 2 on each arm because it’s so...
I have a story for you that involves rejection, detachment and a deep learning. I’ll also be sharing how you or someone you know can get my handmade wedding dress, if you’re interested. First, the story.
Like many women, I’ve had my wedding dress hanging in my closet for a long time. 20-some years to be sort-of precise. It’s come along on 4 different moves. As someone who’s done a lot of decluttering, it felt a little funny to keep it, but that’s what I’ve done up until now.
Towards the end of November, a request came from our local theatre for wedding dress donations for an upcoming show. I waited until the very last day to make my decision and then came to the conclusion that I was ready. I emailed that I would donate it. A reply came back that they had all the donations they needed, so that was rejection #1. It wasn’t harsh, but it meant that I needed to find another way to pass on my beautiful gown.
(By the way, I made my...
Last week, I excitedly told you about how Oakley (my son) got a role in an Olympic commercial. Little did I know a big lesson was a’comin for me and, boy, was it funny.
On Monday, Paul (my husband) took Oakley to get the Covid test necessary to be on set. An information email said that both Paul and Oakley were to be tested. When Paul got there, they said only Oakley was being tested and that Paul would get his test on set on the day of. Feeling that wasn’t right, Paul asked several times, but was told the same thing each time. He would get tested on set on Wednesday.
For much of the day on Monday and Tuesday, Paul and I took Oakley around the city to get the various things he would need. We discovered on Sunday that he had outgrown all his ski gear, so we went hunting for replacements. Then Paul prepped the both of them on Tuesday evening for an early rise on Wednesday.
Paul had never gotten to go on set before, so he said he would take a personal day from teaching to...
In 2008, I was pregnant with baby number 2 and my daughter, Zoe, was close to 3 years old. She was convinced she was going to get a little sister. That idea concerned me, because Zoe was already so amazing that I just knew it would be a lot for a little sister to live up to.
When my son, Oakley, was born, relief washed over me. There would be no little sister trying to replicate Zoe’s footsteps. I thought we had averted sibling rivalry. Hahahaha! I was so naive. (You probably knew that by the end of paragraph one.)
Just because we had a girl and a boy, it didn’t eliminate jealousy between them. Thankfully, they both have all sorts of gifts and talents that we’ve encouraged ever since they were little.
Some of their pursuits are similar, like acting, martial arts and playing sports. Obviously, they both have things about them that are unique. Oakley plays the guitar and sings like an angel. Zoe creates incredible art and writes novels. And yet,...
When my daughter, Zoe, was 2 or 3, we went on frequent outings to a local bakery that gave out full slices of fresh bread as samples. You also got to put on your own butter, so - Score! Zoe liked to butter her own slice and one time, she spread it on so thick that it looked like cheese. I commented on how much butter she used and with a delighted smile, she said, “You can sure tell I’m half-German!”
(All the Germans I know from my mom’s side really like their butter, so Zoe did indeed come by it honestly.)
I also love the taste and texture of butter. I mean… toast with butter. Don’t you just hear the angels singing?
AND I’m picky when it comes to eating. I like my food to be high quality, delicious, sustainable, as close to the original form as possible and usually plant-based. Not a lot of grocery store butter meets my demands, nor do many of the butter alternatives.
A few months ago, I found an interesting package in the butter section...
As I did my Sacred Success Sunday Review the other day, I was reminded about what an amazing week I just had. That’s one of the things I love about intentionally looking back at the previous week; when it gets put all together, I tend to realize how spectacular life is.
One of my highlights last week was that I got to present a virtual workshop to a group that I’ve been a part of for the last 8 years, first as a participant and now as a coach. The way that this workshop came to pass was a manifesting miracle, so I want to share it with you and highlight the key steps so that you can manifest miracles too.
I get a miracle! You get a miracle! Miracles for everyone! (Yep, I’m pretty much like Oprah.)
The group I coach for is called Your Year of Miracles (YOM) and there’s a part of the program called the Inner Circle. Every year the Inner Circle has a retreat. A few years ago, I offered to give a session at the retreat because one of my favourite things to...
Looking out the window, I see a bright blue sky, and big mature trees that have lost all their leaves. They’re casting shadows on a beautiful brick heritage building and the day feels full of possibility.
In this part of the world, it’s fall and that means that some very interesting things are going on energetically. About a decade ago, I learned to look to Nature for answers. Up until then, I had no idea that I was swimming upstream and making life so much more challenging for myself by directly going against Nature’s guidance for so much of the year.
What I’m going to share with you is not rocket science, and yet, it was not obvious to me until someone pointed it out at a workshop I attended. Hopefully this information will serve as a reminder or a starting point for aligning yourself with the energy that’s already flowing. (No need to act like a salmon. Ain't nobody got time for that. Except the salmon, obviously.)
If you look to Nature in the fall,...