We have a practice in our house called Peacock Day.
Of all the things my husband I have done to cultivate loving relationships between us and our two kids, Zoë and Oakley, this practice is one of the most powerful.
Peacock Day is when we take turns saying meaningful, loving things to each other. If it's Zoë's Peacock Day, then Paul, Oakley and I say things that will result in Zoë feeling as proud as a peacock.
Most sentences begin with "I love how you..." or "I'm proud of you for..."
On more than one occasion, I've felt my eyes brimming with tears from the recognition and acknowledgment we've given and received.
There have been several surprising benefits to our Peacock Day Ritual. The first one is that it's particularly fulfilling as a parent to hear what my kids see in me and what they love about me. They have said things like "I'm proud of you, Mommy, for being so persistent in your business," and "I love how you support us and are always there for us when we need...
Last year I attended a retreat where I was guided through a Shamanic Journey. At one point, the instruction was to imagine myself in a place where I felt powerful and grounded.
The image that came to me (after I decided what outfit I would be wearing) was of me standing on red earth, overlooking a huge canyon, with the wind blowing my skirt and my hair. I did indeed feel powerful, grounded and strong.
Since then I've thought of that image occasionally, but not too often.
While in Kauai this summer, I had a remarkable experience. While sitting for guidance one day, the message that came through was that I would be experiencing the real life version of my visualization. (I didn't have the right outfit with me, but the long skirt I had envisioned would have been impractical for a hike anyway.)
Our destination was Waimea Canyon, also known as the Grand Canyon of the Pacific.
Once we climbed to the top, sure enough, I found myself standing on red earth overlooking a vast canyon....
What is courage and why do so many people want more of it?
Recently, I gave a talk for 150 women about courage.
While researching, I came across some information that has influenced my life every day since.
Although bravery and courage are presented as synonyms, there is a profound philosophical difference.
Bravery is an innate quality that signals an absence of fear. There's nothing to overcome. For example, when it comes to speaking in public, I'm brave. I don't have a fear around it. In fact, I LOVE public speaking!
Courage is different because it means acting in spite of fear (such as in this leap my daughter Zoë took 7 years ago).
I once had the opportunity to swallow fire. Let me tell you, there was definitely fear around putting a flaming rag into my mouth and extinguishing the fire with my lips. I actually did it (pretty amazing, right?!?) because there was something greater than the fear.
Courage occurs because we are moving towards an ideal. It might be love,...
The way you do anything is the way you do everything.
That phrase has helped me learn so much about myself.
It means that the way you show up in one situation is exactly how you're showing up in every area of your life. It's a powerful mirror.
While in Hanalei Bay in Kauai this summer, I had an experience where I learned valuable information about myself thanks to that useful phrase.
At one end of the picturesque bay, there is a pier. On my family's first day there, we saw all sorts of people jumping off the pier into the turquoise ocean.
Because of my power word "adventurous", I decided that jumping off the pier would help me expand my comfort zone.
Zoë and Oakley, my kids, enthusiastically agreed that we should jump off together. My husband, Paul, was surprised when I announced my intention because I've spent many years being the opposite of adventurous.
Once I stood on the edge of the pier, I realized that it was a lot higher than it looked. From a mile away, the jump...
I have 6 power words that I use as guides along the journey of the person I want to become.
One of those is Adventurous. While in Kauai this summer, that word helped me on many occasions to expand my comfort zone.
On the ziplining platform that towered above the trees, the guide asked me, "seated Position or Flyin' Kauaian?" I really wanted to reply seated because I knew I could do that. I'd done it twice before- once in Jamaica and once on the warm up line a few minutes prior.
Then my power word reminded me that I am Adventurous and Adventurous People benefit from flyiing through the air like SuperMan.
"I suppose I will do the Flyin' Kauain," I replied unenthusiastically.
My kids cheered. The guide laughed and said, "You don't sound very excited."
He was right. I wasn't excited. I was scared.
He got me all clipped in and explained that I would now stand on the edge of the wooden platform and leap into the air like I was diving into a pool.
"I changed my mind!" I said...
I'm a big believer in following intuition.
I recently did a video series on my YouTube Channel about that very topic. Actually, that's probably why the following has unfolded. How serendipitous!
After an amazing summer holiday in Kauai, where I took a break from my computer, I had some insights.
(Check out the photo of me and my family about to surf... I'll be sharing about that experience soon - Game Changer!)
Paul (my beloved husband of 19 years) and I were driving down a luscious street on Kauai that was covered in tropical foliage. We saw lots of gorgeous houses for sale.
We started dreaming about what it would be like to buy one and live on Kauai. I asked him what he would do if we lived there. He said, "Surf." Then he asked me the same question.
The answer that popped into my head was "Write".
That surprised me initially.
Although I wrote and published a book, for some reason, I still don't consider myself to be a "Writer". It's been more...