The other day, I posted on Facebook about an upcoming workshop I'm doing in Calgary, the Self-Care Pop Up. One of the comments that came back was a woman who said her ideal self-care would be getting a massage everyday.

While that does sound divine, it's one of the top mistakes I find that people make with self-care.

Let's say that self-care is a lotus flower. When you think of said lotus flower, what comes to mind?

I'm guessing the flower, right?

The same thing happens when we think of self-care. We tend to focus on activities that nourish our bodies, which is definitely a good thing. Buuuuut, it's not the whole thing.

The flower part of the lotus is only one aspect of its existence. It's the part that you can see and so it's that part that you focus on.  

When you consider the other part of the lotus flower, it's definitely not as appealing. Under the surface, beneath the glorious, appealing, colourful eye candy, is the slimy, murky, convoluted ball of roots. Who...

Oh this being human... there's so much to learn. Take this morning, for example.

First of all, Paul (my beloved) and I slept through the alarm. That meant that there wasn't quite enough time to make the oatmeal I wanted. Paul suggested I make a tasty melange I've made in the past because it would be speedier. 

It's this amazing blend of cooked apples in coconut oil, with peanut butter, and honey. Then it gets combined with other fresh fruit. Today's selection was mango, blueberries and capeberries (those tangy yellow berries that come with their own little leafy jacket). Finally, I planned to top it with the buckwheat and oat granola I made earlier this week along with some maple cinnamon coconut flakes. It was going to be so good!

 I was happily bustling about, cutting the fruit and getting the bowls out, when I opened the lid to the apple pan. "Ohhhhhh noooooooo!" I cried out dramatically. "It's allllllllll burnt!" 

The bottom of the pan was a crispy...

I was chatting with a friend who works in the health industry recently who said by her estimate, more than 80% of people don't sleep well or feel rested in the morning. What do you think?

I wouldn't count myself in that 80% because I've spent time educating myself on great rest, and most importantly, I've put what I've learned into practice.

A lot of my energy comes from the self-care practices I've put in place before I head off to slumber sanctuary.

Curious about the self-care mistakes you might be making before bed?

WARNING: you might feel defensive when you read the mistakes, and your clever mind might start to make up excuses. I'm not attacking anyone here. I'm just sharing what choices I've made (backed up by sleep experts) that help me get a great night's sleep.

Ok, here are the mistakes:

Mistake #1. Watching stress-inducing TV, movies or videos before bed. That includes the news. Your subconscious notices everything you consume and the couple of hours...

Read this message carefully because this is how Courageous Self-Care makes your life better. Yes, it's a real life example and it's fresh, meaning it happened this very morning.

My kids go to a school that has a modified year-round calendar. That means they have different holidays from the regular public system. For years, these holidays have been a blessing and a major challenge for me. I love being productive and getting stuff done, particularly stuff involving Courageous Self-Care. I also love my kids and want to ensure their holidays are fun and filled with merrymaking.

In the past, I've tried many different approaches to this conundrum:

• work while Zoe and Oakley are at home and encourage them to make their own fun
• find other people to look after them so I can keep working
• arrange playdates so they are occupied while I work
• not do any work and spend the entire time with them (usually 10 days of holidays)

None of these approaches felt like a sustainable solution. There...

In my Courageous Self-Care Facebook Community, I have a daily question/reflection. I'm often the only one who answers the questions, but I find it very useful to think about my answers. The questions are like little guideposts for my week.

Today's question was about honouring our Feminine Energy. I call it Feminine Energy Fridays and the reflection asks what you will be doing to tune into your creative, mysterious, flowing energy.

Here's what I wrote: 

As I was getting into the energy of today, I noticed that there were many things that I wanted to get done, and I also noticed that I felt tired. On these kind of days, I like to honour both of those truths. Rather than push through and just accomplish, I alternate between working and reading. Each session is quick, like about 25 minutes of work and then a chapter of my book. I like the brief sections of time and feel like both sides of me are getting attention.

As I learn more about myself by practicing Courageous...

A few weeks ago, I got an email from a woman named Karen Preysnar, who wanted to interview me for her online summit about self-care and energy.

That request told me how much the world has changed since I started Courageous Self-Care almost 3 years ago. Initially, self-care wasn't really something that people were talking about, but now, there are entire summits devoted to the idea. How exciting! If you feel like doing an excitement jig, you go right ahead.

Of course, I had to interview Karen on the Courageous Self-Care Podcast too. Listen to the podcast here.

Here's a little more info about the Take Back Your Energy Summit. (Of course I agreed to be one of the speakers!)

The Take Back Your Energy summit will help you shift out of the daily habits that drain you, and into the best version of yourself. I invite you to tune in so you can create more vitality, joy & passion in your life.

I’ll be joining 21 wellness experts, healers, meditators and...

The title of this post made me a little uncomfortable. Here's why.

Growing up, I learned to avoid conflict. I was definitely a boat non-rocker. That meant that I mostly kept my opinions to myself, lest I create unwanted disharmony.

Over the last few years, I've been unlearning that tendency and giving my two cents worth more often. (What else can you get for two cents these days? I think that's actually a great price for an opinion).

Soooo, when I wrestled with the wording of this post's title, I felt a little twinge of discomfort about expressing my opinion. In the past, that would have stopped me in my tracks. I'm learning more and more, though, that I get to choose to be fully me and if that doesn't jive with other people, oh well. (I'm happiest doing the jive with my beloved husband, anyway. We have some pretty slick moves.)

Ok, so now that you know the backstory, I can get to my point. My first point. I have a few. 

Point #1

I was super excited to see that...

Oh my gosh, I just got Blog-Anxiety. I didn't know that was a thing until just now. Usually I write a letter to my community and then turn it into a blog. Today, because my to-do list said 'Blog', I decided to compose it on the Blog page and then turn it into a letter. There is a surprising tightness in my chest resulting from that decision. In fact, I'm going to switch over to writing a letter while I take some deep breaths.

Ahhh, much better. 

Dear You,

I think this may be our first interaction of the new year. I'm pretty sure it is, because I've made 3 podcast episodes since the holidays and didn't tell you.

Which leads me to...

Heeeellllpppp! I've fallen into the dangerous trap called "Make Great Stuff and Keep It a Secret". I don't know if you know about that trap, but it's a very sneaky one for me.

I've happily been setting up my vision for the year, getting clear on what I want to do between now and December 31, 2019, and diligently putting it into action. And then...

It's been a little quiet on the Courageous Self-Care Blog front lately. I've been writing, but have only had the capacity to share it with the people in my community.

Today, however, I'm changing that with some big news. 

Carmen Jacob (@TheCarmenJacob), of UpJourney, put out a call for writers to share their thoughts on this intriguing topic: Why Are People Selfish?

I felt compelled to answer that question and my submission got published!

You can read what I had to say, along with several other experts who chimed in on this topic at https://upjourney.com/why-are-people-selfish

Have a peek at the article and see how it aligns or conflicts with your thoughts on people and selfishness.