The ONLY Reason Tough Things Ever Happen

We just finished up our Year End Retrospective and wowee - it was amazing. An important part of reducing overwhelm is to pause and reflect on a regular basis.

If you weren’t able to join us, you can still get your hot little hands on the replay by registering for the event. Or maybe you’re doing your own kind of review. I highly recommend - for your sanity and satisfaction - to take stock of 2023 in some way before charging forward into the new year. 

As you reflect, here’s a concept that has helped me more deeply understand life and how it works. 

Challenges and growth opportunities, only ever happen for one reason and one reason only. 

Although it may not feel like it as you’re going through the challenge, tuck this little nugget in your snazzy back pocket: The challenges are happening for you. 

“Yes, Christina, I’ve already heard that before,” you might think. Stay with me, though, because there’s more to it than just that spiritual truth. 

Challenges happen for you because they are always, always revealing what stuck energy you’re lugging around with you. If you figure out that stuck energy and deal with it right then and there (or soon thereafter), that stagnant energy will no longer need to get your attention through challenging situations. 

Here are a couple of examples for you. 

Last week, someone in my life gave me unsolicited advice and told me things (if you must know the details, I was told I had a receding hairline - which I totally don’t - I just have a high Nefertiti-like forehead). 

(Fun fact: And how do I know that my head is shaped like Nefertiti's? Well, when I was a teacher back in the day, I shaved my head to support a student who was going through cancer treatments. Then, I went to my high school reunion with a shaved head and didn't say anything about it. Once I left, people were in a tizzy and wondered if I was okay. Indeed I was - me and my regally shaped skull. I prefer my head with hair is what I learned.)

Anyways, I was very annoyed by the present day interaction because #1, I don’t like unsolicited advice (even though I know they were trying to help and coming from a place of love) and #2, I started wondering and worrying if my hairline had been receding and I just hadn’t noticed (which is just silly - of course, I would have noticed - I look at myself all the time because most of my work has me in front of the camera!)

So, here’s what I did next. 

Step 1: Notice the emotions

When I became aware that the interaction was bothering me after it was over, I asked myself how I was feeling about it. Indignant and insulted came up.

Step 2: Pour love in

I then said to myself, “Part of me that feels indignant, I love you. I accept that you’re here. Thank you for helping me finally pay attention to you through this situation. I love you because I’m working on loving all the parts of me unconditionally.”

Next, I did the same thing with the insulted part of me. I was amazed that I had actually never loved those parts of me before. It was the first time ever!

Anger showed up next, so I loved the part of me that felt angry. 

Step 3: Soften in the Solar Plexus

The Solar Plexus (just underneath where the ribs splay open) is associated with the energy of the mind. It can get really rigid and tight when we try to think our way through something or make up stories about why things happen. 

Here’s a much better thing to do. Once you pour some love into the parts of yourself that got revealed, bring your attention to your solar plexus and intend for it to soften and melt. Breathe into it, stretch it open and then invite it to soften. You’ll be amazed.

By carrying out these 3 steps, you’ll not only feel better, you’ll be resolving Karmic residue. You may have heard that Karma is some sort of big cosmic justice system, but really, it’s simply unresolved emotion. That’s it. 

Once you integrate the stuck emotions by pouring love in, they no longer need to get your attention so you won’t find yourself in situations in your outer world that are a vibrational match. 

Of course, this situation was relatively minor, so you might be thinking it won’t be effective for whatever you’re going through because it’s not about an erroneous hairline comment. 

Let me tell you, it works for the big stuff too. 

Last year I had all sorts of fear and terror revealed to me through very dramatic circumstances in my family. Fortunately, I knew about this process and poured love into those parts of me. It took more than a few minutes because I had been suppressing those emotions for a very long time (decades as it turns out), but I can report to you that eventually they subsided after continuous practice of these three steps. 

We never need to “get rid” of the more uncomfortable emotions. What we actually need to do is integrate them and the way to do that is to love them. 

Simple? Yes. Easy? Not so much. 

BUT, once you get some practice under your belt, you’ll discover that the emotions that were really intense moments ago just seem to melt. If they do come back, you repeat the three steps again (and again… and again).

Why is this process so effective? Love is a universal solvent. It’s big enough to hold and dissolve all emotions, especially when you’re pouring it into yourself and all your emotional parts. 

Feeling ashamed? Loving that part will help.

Feeling furious? Irate? Filled with rage? Loving those parts will help. 

Feeling anxious? Fearful? Terrified? Love can handle all of those big emotions. 

Challenges are never really about what’s happening in the situation (although the events and people involved can be very captivating and mesmerizing). Challenges are always about the opportunity to pour more love into yourself and love what’s showing up. 

If you don’t remember to pour love in during the challenge, no matter. Whenever your thoughts go in that direction, it’s simply your brilliant system guiding you to the stuck energy so:

Rise up above the circumstances and instead, use your mind to notice how you’re feeling about it. Then love what’s showing up and melt in your solar plexus. 

How’s that for a holiday gift? If you bring this practice into your life, you will be blown away by how powerful it is. Blown away, I tell you. Like an unsecured toupee on a blustery day. 

Let that love flow. Especially towards yourself. It’s so much better than ruminating on why things are showing up. There’s only one reason - you’re ready for more love. 

May you continue to enjoy these holy days by shining your light into the darkness. 

With integrating love and epic courage,

Christina

>Creator of Courageous Self-Care

>So excited for the Conscious New Year’s Celebration this Sunday morning

>loving Thyme Tea right now (see below in Christina Recommends for the recipe link)

The end of the year is upon us, isn't it? That means it's time to clear out the old energy and call in the new. Care to do that in a formal and sacred way? The Courageous Self-Care Conscious New Years Celebration will fit the bill. 

Learn more and register by clicking this link.

Also!

This tea is delicious and a wonderful anti-viral. Plus it's only pennies a cup. Click the link below for the very easy instructions. 

Thyme Tea Recipe 

I like it with both the extra lemon juice and honey!

Last week, I had the great pleasure of attending Jann Arden's Christmas concert. Not only was the music moving and uplifting, I greatly enjoyed seeing people doubled over in their seats from gales of laughter because Jann is so hilarious. 

That's primarily why I went to the concert. My friend told me Jann Arden is super funny and so I bought tickets. Then I was pleasantly surprised by the fantastic music. There are a myriad of excellent songs to choose from and I chose Good Mother because it's so positive and evocative. 

You won't get the hysterical preamble from the live concert, but I'm sure you'll enjoy the song regardless. 

Listen to Good Mother on iTunes

Listen to Good Mother on Spotify