This is Self-Care in Action

Uncategorized Feb 22, 2019

Read this message carefully because this is how Courageous Self-Care makes your life better. Yes, it's a real life example and it's fresh, meaning it happened this very morning.

My kids go to a school that has a modified year-round calendar. That means they have different holidays from the regular public system. For years, these holidays have been a blessing and a major challenge for me. I love being productive and getting stuff done, particularly stuff involving Courageous Self-Care. I also love my kids and want to ensure their holidays are fun and filled with merrymaking.

In the past, I've tried many different approaches to this conundrum:

  • work while Zoe and Oakley are at home and encourage them to make their own fun
  • find other people to look after them so I can keep working
  • arrange playdates so they are occupied while I work
  • not do any work and spend the entire time with them (usually 10 days of holidays)

None of these approaches felt like a sustainable solution. There was usually mom-guilt involved, except for not working at all, which left me frustrated and just the tiniest bit resentful.

This round of February holidays, I decided to craft a satisfying holiday with the kids' input and go with the flow. On the surface, the holiday has looked a lot like the other ones. We've spent time together, they've done fun stuff on their own and everything in between.

What's been different is how I've felt about it. I didn't give myself any demanding deadlines during the holidays and I thought about that ahead of time. (That's a major shift - thinking ahead... it works well; I recommend it).

Ok, that's the backstory. Now on to today. 

Zoe and Oakley wanted to go to the Science Center here in Calgary and they arranged to meet some friends there.

I knew that I was going to have 5 hours to myself and I had big dreams, I tell you, BIG DREAMS.

All those dreams started to crowd my thoughts. There were so many that they traveled to my chest where I noticed some tightness. It was a physical sensation of overwhelm. I recognized it and approached it calmly.

I made a list of what I wanted to do and I made it very reasonable. I saved all the big projects for next week when the kids go back to school.

Then I meditated and took time to acknowledge the tightness in my chest. It receded and then I had a fantastic idea. (Note: the fantastic idea was a direct result of noticing the physical sensation and being with it, rather than ignoring it or powering through it.)

I had planned to do a podcast episode today and then write this note to tell you about it. While meditating, I realized that I could simply tell you about the episode I already published on Wednesday and not do one today.

This seems like a very simple idea, I know, but in my mind, it was a major revelation. I made my list small, and I don't even have to do everything on it today!!! ***Cue giant light bulb glowing over my head

This is an example of Courageous Self-Care. Here's the Cole's Notes version of what happened:

  1. Big Dreams
  2. Overwhelm
  3. Connected with my highest good
  4. Released my expectations for myself
  5. Felt better


Well, that turned out to be a lot more words than I anticipated, but there you go. 

If you want to hear my interview with one of my favourite people of all time, the fabulous Debra Poneman, click this link to listen to the podcast.

One more thing before you head off into your weekend, I wanted to share something exciting. Well, it's exciting for me. I'm not sure you'll feel like doing a jig, but I'm going to tell you anyway, because I believe in sharing our wins and celebrating ourselves. Shine Baby, Shine!

This week, my podcast hit over 10,000 listens. I don't know if that's a big deal in the podcasting world, but it's a big deal in my world. If you've been tuning in, thank you for listening. If you haven't yet had a listen, join in the fun. 10,000 people can't be wrong :)

Ok, that's it. Time to pick up my kids. 

Have a fabulous Friday and a wacky weekend. Why wacky? Why not?

Lots of love,


PS-Fun fact: you can use Siri or Alexa or any of those other computery-AI-helpers to easily find the podcast. Simply say: Play the Courageous Self-Care Podcast please (if you like to be polite to robots like I do) and away you go! So cool.